From Pro Fun City
Did the fun ever start for me? No, not really.
I first visited Vancouver in December of 2004. Being a skyscraper fanatic, I was in heaven as my internet amour du jour drove me into the downtown peninsula via the Cambie Street Bridge after picking me up at the airport.
During my trip I spent a short amount of time in Gastown and was left with the impression that this was a beloved part of the city (I mean, I loved it, so I could not imagine that others would not share the same opinion as me).
I walked along the seawall and through Stanley Park. I had my photo taken at English Bay next to palm trees and enjoyed brunch on Commercial drive; I walked through the city holding hands with another man without any fear of repercussions. I had coffee on a patio wearing a light jacket, jeans and a t-shirt in the middle of December.
To say I was flabbergasted would be euphemistic at best. I had no idea such a place existed in Canada (cue singing cherubs)!
After eleven days, I flew back to Toronto only to find that the city had seen 12 inches of snow fall in my absence and I was not adequately dressed to deal with such circumstances. It quickly sent me into a bit of tailspin and I wanted out (yes, I know that was fickle).
Despite my torrid love affair of two years in Toronto after escaping the clutches of Canada's capital of homogenous mediocrity (Sarnia, Ontario), I felt a draw to Vancouver and although I did not feel unsafe being gay in Toronto, the West End of Vancouver was a prettier, less incestuous version of the area surrounding Church Street.
Young, recently "out" to my parents and filled with a blind love for a man I hardly knew, I dropped everything and moved to Vancouver in the spring of 2005; I was fucking stupid.
It was a typical case of the grass being greener on the lawn that was thousands of kilometres from my lovely home in Toronto.
Within a few months of arriving, I was tired of relentless rain and grey skies, found the summer too cold and I was bored to tears.
My much heralded Gastown turned out to be a giant toilet for the massive population of transients and drug-addicts; the heritage buildings that were being "refitted" were actually having their edifices repainted and their insides completely removed, thus destroying the whole idea of enjoying said "heritage". Bravo, Vancouver.
The Gay Scene? More like a Gay Moment or Millisecond. Within three weeks everyone knew who I was and I could not even fart without the whole West End knowing about it (and I rarely fart). The only places I frequented went to shit after the Dufferin closed in order to make way for a shiny new restaurant and hotel.
The sketchy and decrepit crowd that frequented that "hotspot" ended up at Pumpjack; although the management may have been happy about the increased business at their establishment, patrons such as myself ended up literally molested and sexually harassed by disgusting grease balls.
They were kicked out only to be let back in ten minutes later, so instead of heading there with friends religiously every Sunday, I have gone four times in the last three years. Do I blame the grease balls? Fuck no! Grease balls need their own version of "Cheers" where everybody knows your...stench.
After giving up on my people, I tried to rekindle my love for vintage clothing shopping, but I quickly doused that fire when I realized that getting to the heart of that scene in Vancouver (Main and 22nd-ish) via public transit required a rather long trip only to find a scattered 14-block strip of overpriced rubbish. Next!
The one great thing that Vancouver does have is restaurants. I am fortunate enough to be in a relationship with a foodie who can afford such meals! Otherwise, there is next no pulse in this city and I found that comparing my previous home of Toronto to Vancouver was like comparing apples to throat cancer.
If you have actually managed to read this far into my long-winded rant, you deserve a fucking pat on the back in the form of a small shred of optimism: There may be hope for No Fun City.
Yes, Gastown still has more Shitbags per capita than any other mildly gentrified part of the city, but there appears to be a movement there. Some cool bars have been gaining attention and funky restaurants without a massive price tag have been opening too. I have even seen different ethnic and social groups intermingling there!
And I have to admit, it is nice to be able to go to such places without fearing having my face punched in by some Ed Hardy-wearing, bigoted suburbanite.
Hopefully the mix of commercial, industrial and residential zoning in that corner of the city will allow more venues to open (or at least remain open) without the typical Nimbyism that runs rampant in the rest of the city.
Perhaps electing a city council with bigger ambitions and an active heartbeat will be enough to jumpstart this city following the Olympics. Perhaps.
Anyone care to sponsor me for a night on the town in "your" Vancouver? I may be down, but I am not close-minded!
Matt P. Disgruntled Vancouverite
The Fun Vancouver Pledge These are the policy positions that we are asking candidates to pledge on. A candidate does not have to agree to every policy suggestion here, but we are asking them to check the ones that they feel they can honestly support.
No Fun City History How did we get where we are? What policies have been discarded, and what progress has been made?
Pro Fun Leaders If you're running or have run a business or an event and it was harder than it should have been tell your story here.
Citizens' Stories Lose your good times to city shutdowns? Move away because you were too bored? Tell us your story here.
